MYSTERY GUEST(S?)

My son’s wedding is this year on All Hallows Eve – yes, that’s Halloween. It’s planned as a black tie, masked ball and will take place at dusk. Very appropriate for Halloween. Hopefully, no one will misconstrue the meaning of “masked ball” and show up as Spiderman wearing a black tie. You would think everyone would get it, but you never know.

Those fears became more real when I started receiving the RSVP cards. First only one arrived – from my neighbor whom I already know is coming. Then they started arriving two and three at a time - very exciting. Until I open one, pull it out of the envelope and it’s blank. Yes, BLANK. I stared at it for a moment, confused. I looked at the envelope, no return address. I looked at it again – like maybe they used invisible ink or something and all of a sudden a name and number would appear! Duh! Do you ever have times when things just don’t process in your brain right away? When you just keep looking, like your going to figure it out? Like there must be something I’M doing wrong? What the hell? Did they pull it out of the stamped envelope, look at it, and say “Hmmm, that’s silly. Why would they send me a blank RSVP card in a stamped envelope? How stupid, I guess I’ll just send it back since it has a STAMPED envelope.” Or, did they just have a senior moment – they remembered to RSVP but just spaced the filling out part. We’ll probably never know. Meanwhile, I’m keeping it with the others and will count it as “two.” I just hope it’s not Spiderman.

MY FIRST BLAH BLAH BLAH POST

In my attempt to be a writer that actually gets paid for her work, I am using the venue of the blog to practice my writing skills. I have been using a pen and paper or, more recently, typing stuff into Micosoft Word. Blogging somehow feels more "real." Like real writing. People can actually read this stuff if they are so inclined.

I did not understand blogging AT ALL until very recently. Of course, I was aware of it and had heard of many but hadn't tapped into the blogging community. Why would I want to read other people's junks? I didn't have a clear picture of it till I was sent the blog of a friend's daughter. She writes about her experience as a young wife and the mother of a toddler. It's quite irreverant and often very funny. It's just her personal experience told in her words from her point of view. Sometimes I like them, sometimes I don't. It's the same stuff I write in my journal. It was like a light went on! I have been wanting to write but can't seem to get my head around what that's about. What do I write about? Who would want to read it? Why would they read it? How would they read it? What is IT?? Well, this is the perfect venue to begin my expression as a writer. I'm very excited.

I actually started another blog "Mumbling and Meandering". I've written a couple of things in that one. One is pretty funny - the other two are OK. I've shared that with a few people so they know it's me and that makes me self-conscious. Hence, I'm worried about how it sounds, what language I use, if the punctuation and grammer are correct, etc. etc. etc. With this one I'll write whatever the hell I want. If I want to use the "f" word, I will. Yeah! How Fun!

BROOM LADY

So, I’m at work today and I walk past this lady on the treadmill. Her headband formed a perfect arc around her head. She had very thick, shoulder-length, blonde hair cut severely straight across the bottom. Apparently, she got carried away with her flat iron. It looked as if a broom head was sitting on her neck. Not an O Cedar, plastic, angled-head broom with little whispies on the bottom that pick up all of the dust bunnies, but an old fashioned, straight-across-the-bottom, fat-headed, straw broom. I don’t usually make fun of people, but I HAD to share with two of my co-workers. They agreed and laughed their asses off. It was hysterical. Maybe you had to have been there. Nevertheless, I found it blog-worthy. (not to be confused with sponge-worthy)

Heads Up

There is so much activity at Whole Foods. Lots of people, all types and nationalities. Well, maybe not ALL, but lots. White, Asian, Middle Eastern, Black. Glasses, no glasses, blondes, brunettes, redheads, helmet heads, shaved heads, baldies, sunglassed heads, hat heads, ponytailed and headbanded heads, scarfed heads, braided and dreadlocked heads, streaked, cropped, stringy, poofy, curly, ribboned and clipped. Wow! The types of heads seem unlimited. There are a limited number of people on the planet yet unlimited heads. No two are alike and they change themselves. Tomorrow the hatted head might be bald and the bald head hatted. The stringy head ponytailed and the curly one straightened. The scarf head may be a sunglassed head and the sunglassed may be flowing. The red head could become a buzzed head and the blonde a brunette. Are there any true heads? Most of the grey heads are true heads. What about the blonde heads? Hmmm. . .

Yesterdays blog spoke of butts, today’s speaks of heads. Will tomorrow’s be about buttheads?

Lesson from a Chair

We have a wooden chair with a round, red leather seat. The leather is tacked to the wood with bronze nailheads close together around the circle. The chair swivels and rocks. It was Butch's grandfather's chair. Or was it his dad's chair? Either way, it has a history - a history of butts. How many butts have sat on this wood and leather seat? How many bodies have swiveled and rocked? How many sets of arms have rested on it's wooden arms? These are curious questions. Were they just family members? Did the women ever use the chair? Or did they clean it and not sit in it? Did the kids twirl around when Dad wasn't watching? Did they sit in his lap in this chair? What would the chair tell us about it's experience? Skinny butts? Fat butts? Did it long for lighter, shaplier butts? It looks healthy and strong. Did butts make noises on it? Did it care? Men's butts, women's butts, little boy butts, little girl butts, teenaged butts, black butts, white butts, asian butts, indian butts - did it know which butt was there? Or maybe there was just one or two butts before mine. I think there were lots of butts that tried it out; that even sat there just once. I'm glad I'm not a chair. I would rather look at butts than have to hold them all the time. That would get boring for me. For a chair, however, that is it's purpose. At least it knows it's purpose and stands ready to fulfill it - beckoning anyone who wants to sit. I wish knowing my purpose were that easy. A chair just has to sit there and "be" and it's purpose is evident. If I just sit there and "be" will my purpose become evident? Perhaps. That would be meditation. Isn't that a purpose of meditation - to discover your purpose?